Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Energizer Bunny Needed

Ever feel like your batteries need to be recharged? I’m there now. I am tired…not just physically, but with the tiredness that comes from the monotony of everyday living.

It is my own fault. I knew when I quit my job last year to stay home with BK, it was imperative that I stay involved with people and activities that would keep my mind active and my resolve to be a stay-at-home mom strengthened. I have done neither of these things on a consistent basis. There are days when I feel like my brain is turning to mush…days when I think I’ll scream if I have to hear Barney sing how much he loves me one more time. There are also days when I feel very unappreciated (actually, those are most days). I realize that the sacrifices I am making now are an investment in my daughter's future...but in this world of instant gratification, sometimes it's tough to stay focused when I do not reap the benefits immediately.

I have come to believe that being a full-time mother and wife is one of the most challenging lifestyles a woman can chose. Not only is it hard work, but for me it is a constant battle to overcome feelings of inadequacy and to face the disapproval and disrespect from those who do not understand the importance of a my commitment to my family…even in the Christian community.

What a shame that our society has tricked us into believing that in order to be fulfilled in life, women need careers. I run into women all the time who tell me there is no way they could stay home…work gives them purpose in life. Right after I left my job, I really struggled with my identity. My job and my identity were so firmly entwined that it was hard to separate the two…to be honest, I am not sure that I have completely mastered it yet.

I shared some of these thoughts with a friend who is a homeschooling mother of seven. She sent me a wonderful list of things that she has done over the years to keep herself in the right place mentally as she lives out her convictions to be the best mother and wife she can be. What an inspiration she is to me! I am so thankful for her friendship.

I know that my thoughts and beliefs lead directly to my feelings…and ultimately to my actions. I have a choice of what to think and believe. The responsibility of staying content in this season of my life rests firmly on my shoulders. So here is my plan of revitalization:

*Take a break from the ordinary. I will plan a mini-vacation with hubby and the princess…maybe for the weekend…just to get away for a few days and enjoy ourselves.
*Be purposeful about cultivating friendships with like-minded women. I am not sure exactly how to go about doing this, but I know it is very important. Church is a good place to start. There are also online groups for stay-at-home moms.
*Be careful about what I read, watch and hear. It makes no sense to work hard to renew my mind, only to let some television show or magazine sabotage the progress I’m making.
*Work on a task that I love to do. My new blog is an excellent way to utilize my love of writing.
*Challenge myself to do a task that I don’t love to do. Oh my gosh, I guess this means that I have to tackle that junk room that has been calling my name for the longest time.
*Laugh, laugh and then laugh some more. Nuff said.

Hmm…sounds like a good plan. I will keep you updated.

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